October 17, 2020
Well folks I had real dreams of getting back to blogging, I had real dreams of documenting this historic pandemic time with pictures, commentary, and most importantly, raw, in real-time feelings. As usual though, life got in the way, which is not necessarily a bad thing.
For me, writing is cathartic, therapeutic. After I've written for this blog, or something else that I'm particularly proud of, I feel a bit lighter, as if something has been released. I know this is not the feeling many get about writing. Perhaps it was my years as an introvert, or my sensitive, quiet, disposition that make it easier for me to type/write it out than to say it all.
Flashback to January when I changed jobs, I also started getting set up with VIPKID, an online company for teaching English to children in China. I heard how long it can take to get fully booked so I anticipated having some free time. I thought I could blog on mornings when I'm not teaching. Well much to my surprise, I was up and running pretty quickly. Since we were home anyway, I taught every morning, 7 days a week. I kept my evenings open too but they took longer to get booked. I try NOT to get on the computer in the evening because it is not productive for me, so just like that, my time was swished away. It didn't even cross my mind for many months to take some time off for myself. My main work had slowed almost to a halt so how could I stop doing the little amount of paid work that I had?
Here I write, 10 months later, for months I was teaching every morning and evening, and became burned out. On the one hand, it's just a few hours, on the other hand though, that was pretty much my only time to myself ALL THE TIME. We are still quarantining, my husband is still working from home, we are together pretty much all the time. I miss my quiet, I miss slow, I miss having time to complete a task, even for 10 minutes without interruption. Sure my kids could be on their screens for hours and leave me alone, but I can't do that all the time. After our beach vacation in August, I stopped teaching at night, which helped so much. Starting this month, I'm taking the weekends off too. I have a renewed energy just the thought of no alarm and taking it slow. This morning I got up at 6 anyway, and had a blissful hour or so to myself.
Time to go, I've been interrupted about 10 times already, and if I don't submit now, my 20+ drafts will tell you, it's not going to get done!
Be well all, and I hope to be back again soon, there's so much more to share. <3
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